27th March, 2006

Hello again and welcome to my weekly or (sort of) 'whenever I can write my' blog.
This weeks the over-hyped presentation by my 'PAL 1' and 'PAL 2' group to the Management of the bank was a little . . .er . . . chaotic. I was hoping that this day would come and pass by without much ado, but by the time the program was set to begin, I was ready to pass out sleeping pills, specially to the CEO of our bank. Seeing him snoring away through the program would have put some smile on a few peoples lips.
I know it is not exactly easy to figure out the timing. It is always a little tricky to figure out how long a new presentation will run, especially if you are doing it for the first time. In the end, the group managed to do a fairly good job, and the night ended with me sleeping, I guess, on one side, all throughout the night. I got up with a sore arm., but that was perhaps, worth all the excitement.
But no time to dwell. This month is getting crazier as the days appear to pass by. The latest program, PAL 5 is set to make its debut in the first week of next month, and these days, it is testing, interviewing and recruiting, and all in the excruciating speed faster than light. Well, sort of, anyway. Or anyways. I am sure that anyways is incorrect, but I seem to overhear so many young people using it, and considering my age, and the need to feel young again, I have made it my habit to use anyways. Kind of, makes me a slimy part of their class.
Yesterday, Khaleej Times interviewed the three remaining members of the ailing ILSD, the society we so painstakingly managed to keep limping through for the better part of last year. We hope that the interview, that is scheduled to hit the press next Monday or Tuesday will rejuvenate and revamp and revivify (hee hee I got this from the thesaurus) our great daring venture, The International Literary Society of Dubai. So, patrons, keep your eyes and ears open, and get your copies of City Times, next week.
if you are bakheel (stingy) enough not to dole out a couple of dirhams and get your very special copy.
My friends tell me that I am happy to stay aloof and keep away from the blazing companies of friends and well wishers. I guess invisibility is a pretty good shield against loonies. Another friend mentioned that when Michael Jackson sang "I am Bad" he was singing about himself. We should have wised up about his way of life then. It is always easy to be wise after the event.
I have the 'Hatta Pictures' posted on my geocities site
If you have the time then you can see for yourself what are PAL program is all about. Fun, Fun and more….fun.
An Arabic custom.
If coffee is offered in small containers called 'finjaan', then when finished it is offered to the person pouring it with the polite shokran (thank you), it will prompt him to fill the container again and offer it to you. If you have had enough, then you need to twist and shake the container sideways two to three times, and that will mean that you have had enough.
I think this week my blog has been quite boring. So, I will end it with a blond joke (Oh No)
Three women go down to Mexico one night, get drunk, and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night before. The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair, and is asked if she has any last words. She says, "I am from Grace University, and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent," They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately prostrate themselves; beg for her forgiveness, and release her. The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words, "I am from the Creighton School ! of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent." They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again, they all immediately prostrate themselves; beg for her forgiveness, and release her. The last one, a blonde, is strapped in and says, "Well, I'm from the University Michigan and graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell you right now, you ain't gonna electrocute nobody if you don't plug this thing in."
Well, until next time, it is goodbye from him and goodbye from me.
Take care and look after yourselves. I have very few people who frequent my pages, so I need you all to be in excellent health to help me in this little quest that might end up with all the paparazzi's chasing me all over the town.
Bye for now


17th March, 2006

Howdy Guys and Gals out there. We have great sunshine in Dubai (although as I write, it is a sort of a cloudy day out here) good enough for cycling or going to the beach, while you know what I am sitting and doing. Well, you guessed write. I am sitting and writing my blog. Tee Hee.
You can call me lazy, you can call me any name you think befits me, but, here I am, slouched over my chair, sipping Folgers and contemplating what I would do, other than work or physical exercise, that is.
A little bit of our history and some Arabic Culture.
In the late seventies, groups of expatriates (including a handful of Nationals) would be partying, specially on Thursday nights (our weekday off at that time was a Friday only) and we would return home very late in the night, or very early in the morning, it all depended on how you looked at the situation. And, this was much to the detriment of my late Grandmother, who was a very holy person, and this made her feel very sad for I was not following in her footsteps. Well, I am not very sure, if it was New Years Eve or Christmas, we were all invited to the British Council's house in Sharjah (mind you , Sharjah at that time was not barren, I mean in the alcohol sense of things). And, since everybody knew each other in some way or the other, we all ended up in his, sort of, estate in Sharjah. I think it was probably midnight when most of the expats decided to take a dip in the swimming pool. (again mind you, fully clothed). So it was all fun, and I was standing by the edge and cheering the guys and gals alike, when all of a sudden, I felt a thud, and the next thing, I found myself in the freezing water, all suited and booted. Imagine me, returning home, and there is my loving sweet little grandma waiting for me. I told her it was raining in Sharjah. She did not believe it, for there was hardly a whiff of a cloud in the entire sky. I got a stern lecture on the why's and the why not's, and I couldn't wait for the cue to exit and get into my snug, warm bed.
Now for some Arabic Customs.
The Arabian culture goes a long way. The white flowing dress we adorn has some history to it as well. It's white color reflects the sun, and the robe being of full length manages to trap whatever air or wind and circulate it all around thus cooling the person. The headgear (it may sound silly), but there was a time when the whole caravan's fate and survival depended upon it. There are very few trees in the desert, you know and as such, very few places to tie your camel. The black woven piece called 'Agaal' that holds the white headgear in place, opens up and the two front legs of the camel are lodged into it. Thus the camel is not able to wander off into the night. For you see, without the camels, the whole caravan would be in danger. The white long scarf would protect against the wind and the sand that it would hurl at the travelers, and also serve as protection in blinding sandstorms where the parents would tie each of their children's hand on one side of the piece and tie the other to their hand. Visibility during sandstorm is very low in the desert and the howl made by the wind makes it impossible for a person to shout over the noise, thus an infant or a small child wandering off, could be lost forever.
I have quite a few interesting facts cropping up here and there in my first book. So, if you get the chance, then read it to get more insight in how Dubai developed in the seventies and eighties.
Last week I accompanied our PAL1 and Pal 2 trainees to a team building event to Hatta. I was purely amazed at what the puny twins and the other participants achieved during this extravaganza. If I am able to post some photos of the event on my WebPages, then I shall do so next week.
Well, it is now time from my weekly routine. A glass of the very best chardonnay, and the amazing Tchaikovsky's 'Swan Lake'.
Take care my friends, and I shall join you all soon. If you have not been able to visit my friends homepages, then do so now.
Eoin Ó Donnuartaigh also known as Dún Garbhán is from Ireland. His poetry webpage is http://www.geocities.com/eoinodonnuartaigh
My dear friend from Canada, is Aimee Pecile (aka the little fairy princess) and her webpage ishttp://www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ag477/libra.html

Cheerio


3rd March, 2006

Hiya Folks,
Just when you all gave up on me. Just when you al thought the coast was clear. Just when you felt that the sea was calm again, I am BACK. Yes, but not with a vengeance. So, I will definitely not write pages and pages on my blog. And, I will not talk about the reasons that kept me away for so long. It is the end result that counts, and . . . I am back!
I was wondering about how many of you folks know Dubai. So, let me narrate a few stories that should depict life in Dubai from the past to the present.
In the fifties, there were no toilets (restrooms), so women used to go out in droves, and at a secluded place answer to the call of nature. Others would stand vigil to warn and ward away, both suspecting and unsuspecting (note the word suspecting, we too had peeping tom's in Dubai) passer's by. The guys used to be solitary figures, but they had to frequent places deemed to be ethically and morally acceptable and not places visible to others. However, call of nature is sometimes a quick urge to purge. You know what I mean. Well, there were times when people would not care about the morality of their actions, and this old and decrepit judge would be greatly infuriated by such actions. So, if he did catch anyone, he would have them presented in his court where publicly fine them 15 rupees ( in the fifties the local currency was rupees and paisa, thus the word baizad which is derived from paisa and means money). Until one day, in a packed court, a guy told him, actually you should fine me eighteen and not fifteen. Rupees. (Now, the next is a little crude, so if you want to skip it, then fine by me). So, when the judge asked him why, he replied to a packed laughter in the audience that while he was answering the call to nature, he also let off a lot of fire crackers, and he thought he should pay the extra for this was a 'son et luminaire' piece of exhibition. The Judge was so embarrassed that he never fined anyone again.
In the sixties, Our Ruler Sheikh Mohamed's late father, the ever so visionary, The Late Sheikh Rashid was once going through Newsweek (or perhaps it was Times magazine, not so sure) and he asked his advisor how much it would cost to put a full page advertisement in the magazine. The advisor turned around and said, your highness, why do you want to spend such a lot of money on a worthless piece of extravaganza. His reply was, everyone knows America, England. I just want, even a few people, who chance to read this, should know that we also do exist in this world.
What a vision! See, where Dubai is right now. It is nice to be meticulous in your work, be a great team manager, but if you do not have a vision (your ambition or goal) then you need a lot of luck if you want to get anywhere. So, my little piece of advice, 'Go out. Go find yourself. You are a very important being if you know your own value, and you try hard to find it.' That is about all it needs to be.
70's were the hip hop times when many expatriates converged into Dubai. I drove to the police academy to get my driving license. This was a time when we all mingled together, the Brits, the Ozzies, the Yankees. All of us, and every night was party night. Dubai was small, and everyone knew each other.
As you can see I have addressed this rambling report which I had promised to keep short and fun. Well, I will continue the rest in my next blog.
I am now sitting in my living room sipping 'Fleury' listening to Strauss, and staring at the balcony outside. It is March in Dubai, and the temperature is in the mid twenty degrees centigrade. A slight breeze is blowing and the sun is shining meretriciously. I know I should be out there cycling to the Meadows or the Springs. Or lying on the beach somewhere in Jumeira.
However, as usual, there is an upside. Although the Flamingoes are frequenting the "Ras el Khoor' area, and the Sea Gulls sweeping across the Staraits of Hormuz, I am constantly entertained by the resident birds chirping away. I have regular visits by Hoopoe's, Honeysuckles and Mynah's. I have heard we also have Owl's but I am yet to see one, specially at Greens.
So, wherever you are, may the force be with you and do enjoy your friends while you can.



3rd February, 2006

Well, a week has passed by. Sort of an uneventful week, other than the fact that I beat Paul to carry over the mantle of leading for one more week. I was leading 4-1 (that is how it has always worked) and he managed to get to 4 all, and I could see that he was overjoyed as he overcame me, point by point. I could see defeat staring in my eyes, until I was able to muster some additional strength and get back to win 6-4. He has promised me that it will be a different story next week, and I daresay, at the pit of my stomach, I somewhat believe him.
I think I am getting to become an old geezer. (okay, it is true. I am looking for sympathy) Well, the other day, when exiting, for some senile reason, I thought the glass door was open, and I walked right into the glass. I looked around, and this guy was sitting on a sofa quite close by. So, I turned to him and thought I'd make a joke of this. So, I asked, "Did you see that?" He shook his head and said, "No, I did not see that." I stared at him. Hello, I deliberated, he was so close, how could he had missed the sound of me crashing into the glass door. What's wrong with people these days. At least have a laugh at other people's expense.
I must bring this rather funny incident which happened some time back, but I recollected it only recently. My friend has one of the most jealous child or person I have ever come across in my life. When she was dancing with a friend of her husbands, he managed to get himself right between the two of them, separating them by holding them back with each hand of his on their stomach. It was even more funny considering that he was only three at that time. How the world is different now, then the world I can recollect long back. I think the only thing that mattered to me when I was three was ice cream, kisses and huggies from my peers. That's all. I did not understand sex, and I thought it was all too funny whenever I came across adults kissing each other. This kid knew exactly what it meant. I am frightened that future babies might contemplate sex on the day they are born. So, all you Nurses and Doctors beware, the next male child may enter the world having a boner. (Tee Hee)
Anyone has any idea how I can get over my writing block. Not that I have anything interesting to write, it is just too boring sitting on the computer and exchanging ideas with the monitor and the web cam. They are both morons, you know.
Thanks Nasir for contributing towards the 'jokes' column for this weeks news 'thingy'. If anyone has any interesting site or news, I will be most happy to carry it on my WebPage.
Thanks for stopping by, and hope to chat with you'll next week.



January 27th, 2006

Well, can you believe it? How quickly a month has vanished in 2006, and will tell you one thing, after a very promising start, right now am almost looking forward for January to end, and hope that February can ring in a much better time.
So, what did January accomplish. Well, it began on Mount Everest and ended in the Mariana Trench, sort of. Good times as well as plenty of bad time. A bottle of Fleurie and a lot of Bach was the antidote to lost love, once again sort of.
Tomorrow is D-day. I have tried my very best with Paul to avoid him in tennis. I guess, I have run out of excuses. I will keep you posted next week.
A friend from Thailand has asked me to go to the Thailand's King's site where the King has posted his music and song. It's quite nice, and the music is sort of reggae-blues. So, try it out. I have posted his poem in the NEWS section along with his the URL. Also, did you know that our ruler, H.H. Sheikh Mohamed Bin Rashed also writes poetry. How about visiting his site also, which is found at www.sheikhmohammed.com/english/index.asp
Someone asked me is it easy to cycle hands free. Well, like anything else in life, it has a lot to do with mind and eye co-ordination. I began with concentrating on the wheel, and willing it straight, as I let go off my hands. For the first umpteen times, the wheels wobbled and very nearly threw me off the bike, and once, luckily (in few instances in my life where luck was on my side), I managed to avert flattening a dog who in turn, decided to ignore territorial rights and raced me to what probably was a very unhealthy exercise. I decided then never to take the route again. However, my senility got the better of me, and last week I ended up in our friend's territry. Whoever heard of that the elephant is the animal with the best memory. I will tell you this, as soon as my eyes landed on this 'bitch's eyes, it lit up, and I could actually see saliva dripping form its mouth, and a curt sigh escaping her lips as she began chasing me. What the hell? Where has my luck gone, that, only female of other ill-begotten species are making a vie at me?
Did you know that choices would be simpler to make if one of the plan was pareto-superior to the other? A pareto-superior plan is one that makes one person better off, and critcially, makes nobody worse off. However, are there ever such plans found in the REAL world. If Paul should win tomorrow (which I am sure he will considering the state of mind I am in right now) then he will not care for the pareto-superior plan, and neither will I, if I manage to subdue him once again. Right now, I would like to manage to hit the dirt once more with fleurie as my companion and Bach in the background. This choice is simple, it has only one winner.
Take care, and I hope to write to you'll again next week.



20th January, 2006

Hiya folks out there! I hope you all had a fantastic start to this new year. My story continues from the last blog, because certain exciting things happened so early.

If you can all recollect that I mentioned that the most exciting thing happening to me was beating Paul in our last match of the season, and I preferred that to all the other nice things that happened. Well, I was at the New Years Party at my friend Brian's house, and after downing a couple of 'Bubbly cocktails' I was all ready to express my thoughts about what I had achieved during the year which was going to come to an end in the next hour or so. So, I was all ranting and raving about our exciting tennis game, and how I had finished the year overwhelming Paul. And this word soon spread around, and everyone flocked over to hear my story ( I am a great story teller, mind you, incase you have not guessed it yet).
Right! Then I noticed everyone became silent. For, who walked in, but my one and only . . . yes . . . you have guessed it, right!

Paul!

And soon he was making his new year resolution that he would prepare himself for the coming week's onslaught, and beat the hell out of me. It is now three weeks, and I have (sort of) managed to continue my dominance, but not on the tennis court. Instead, I have been able to maintain my superiority through petty excuses, such as, I had a terrible back ache, or I had some urgent work at the Immigration. Tee Hee. Comprendo.

Well, he has told me that, excuse or no excuse, 28 would be the final day of all mother-of-excuses for me. I can't wait for the showdown. But, I need to do something about the flab around my stomach, and my poor heart, and my failing eyesight, and . . . and . . . Oh well, it is just a game. Only, someone has forgot to mention this to Paul.

The beginning of the New Year has seen also many sad tidings. Our beloved Ruler, Sheikh Maktoum passed away, and my best friend has been diagnosed with lung cancer. These are two bad news, and I just hope and wish, he gets better. I have known him for the better part of thirty years, and I do not wish to lose him so soon. But, what can we do? If this is what fate has written for us, then we may not be able to alter it.

My New Year resolutions and thoughts. Learn Golf, take a number of vacations and, one which I have already accomplished. Shave my 15 year old beard. Wow, all the guys like it, while all the girls think I have gone . . .

Well, if you have any funny or exquisite New Year Resolution, then do drop me a line, and I will be happy to include it in my journal next time.

Take care and see you all soon



30th December, 2005

Hi there all of you swingers, dancers, smilers and the grumpy.
2005 is just about gone.
I thought about it, and I reflected upon my thoughts to discern one most important thing that happened to me this year. Well, lots of events, heartaches and headaches.
My Gulf4Good challenge that took me across the beautiful plains of Thailand as I breezed through the lush green mountainside on a cycling trip that culminated in Angkor Wat in Cambodia.
Met many nice friends including some very, very special ones who are very close to me right now.
Lost a couple of dear friends, and was saddened by the earthquake in Pakistan, the Hurricane Katrina in the US, the London and Bali bombings.
Health wise ending the 2005 on a rather dismal note with a debilitating toothache and fever that would have felled a raging bull, let alone, I am merely human.
Work wise met and made new friends in a series of programs that my boss and I, designed. It was very successful, and I even delivered a lecture during the 6th annual GCC Career Conference at the Metropolitan palace Hotel in December.
But, can you believe what cropped up when I thought of the 'one' great thing that happened to me, this year. You won't believe it, even if I give you guys a hundred chances.
Well, it was, get ready for a laugh,
I was going to end the year with having beaten Paul in our last game of tennis. Tee Hee. I ma sure he is having the blues right now. But, he is still a great friend.
So, what's my 2006 wish. Well, apart from all the hula bulus, (if I have the spellings correct) you know what I mean, like peace on earth, may the rotten people all catch gonorrhea, and the good people go to heaven, sort of, I have thought that I would take up, Golf. Yes, now, you are certain that I am a weirdo. Well, I have always thought of being different. Even the way I wear my watch and hold my pen, although, Sal insists I have copied it from him.
I am sitting down and listening to Strauss. Tomorrow, I hope to go to Brian's house (toothache and fever permitting) and when the clock strikes midnight, my wish for all of you'll will be to have a very happy, healthy and wealthy 2006.
Take care and see you soon.



17th December, 2005

Hola Amigos and Senoritas

It's me back again, and so the torment begins. Like in the movies, when 'IT' (adapted from Stephen Kings novel IT) eventually made a comeback, everyone began screaming and shouting hysterically. Well, I feel the same for all you addicted people out there. Just when will all this fun end.

My boss is away on charity work to Balacote in Pakistan, and I was hoping I'd get away from this mundane scenario. But, someone was needed to tend to the flock of sheep in his absence, and they could not come up with a better scapegoat. Got it, a goat tending to a flock of sheep. What will the world come to?

This week I managed to sledge Paul out of his rhythm and was comprehensively leading 5-2, when he somehow, found his groove back and clawed back to 5-4. Eventually, as with every drink break (this one more so), I pointed out all the mistakes he was making, and thus got him so confused that I managed to win in the end. I do not think he is going to have a nice Christmas as he is flying to London this weekend, and then I will be away for a couple of weeks. So, I shall hold on to the trophy well into the new year. Tee hee.

Yesterday, I ventured into Verdi's world of La Traviata, and I cannot explain in layman's terms the joy and relaxation I got out of it. Perhaps Jacob Creek's Shiraz Rose had something to do with it, but then, I would be merely insinuating. It is a fantastic piece of music, and I recommend this to all 'classical music' lovers.

Last Monday I had my first 'professional' lecture. But, before I write about it, let me tell you an exciting thing that happened. For some reason, my colleague Rachael and I, had penned down Sunday in our diaries. So, consider this scenario, when I walked in to the workshop all ready and robust to walk the altar of truth, I found myself walking away, sort of, humiliated and embarrassed, although the glued smile on my face endeavored to show otherwise. Rachael, who is 5 months pregnant, attributed this 'blonde moment' to her pregnancy, and I had to think of it as a 'bald moment' as I think I need only a couple of years to arrive at this healthy moment when I can finally accept that I am bald and not just balding. Well, whatever.
The lecture went off better than expected and I can proudly admit that I had the audience on their feet, most of the time. The only problem is if you guys will protest to the actual meaning of the word 'most'. Then, I will definitely try to shy away, and not discuss this matter further.

Oh well, I guess I have bored you guys enough. For all my Christian readers, I would like to wish you all a very merry Christmas. Until next time, cheerio.




6th December, 2005

Howdy friends from all over.
My apologies for being so tardy in updating my blog. It has been a tough couple of weeks (not that I except life to get better) and hundreds of petty, uninteresting and mundane things that were the orders of the past fewdays. Well, in case you are wondering, and chuckling at the thought, then I must admit, my life has never been that interesting anyways.
I have started using the word 'anyways' instead of 'anyway', I do not know why. It is just that everyone appears to be using the, sort of, plural form of the word 'anyway' although if I am not mistaken, then the plural of' anyway' should be 'always'. Correct me if I am wrong.
The last two weeks saw me in action against Paul in our hateful game of tennis. I beat him in the first encounter, and was mighty pleased at his dejected look at the end of it all. I wondered at that time, that I should quit playing, since I was ahead of him, but greed too the shape of pride, and I decided that I should continue torturing him by beating him again the next time we met, and then again and again for the rest of my life. Right.
No, wrong! He bounced back and taught me a lesson in my attempts to move the extra flab that for some reason or the other has appeared all over my body. I have absolutely no idea where all this fat is coming from. I only eat one meal a day. Well, sort of. I do not eat anything in the night, except when the animal in my stomach begins to growl, then I indulge myself to Ice Cream, nuts, fresh fruit, vanilla custard, whipped cream . . .yummy, I think I am going now and indulging myself once more. Who cares if Paul beats me, and who cares if I add the extra inch to my side and my buttocks (Sal gets all too excited when the word buttocks is mentioned) I am only living for today, and I will worry about tomorrow only when tomorrow actually comes. I have to trade in a secret to all of you guys out there, tomorrow is only a day away, and when it finally arrives, it is also known as 'today', and today is always (or anyways) my Ice Cream day. Comprendo.
Remember 'Gulf for Good' and all the exciting trips that we have undertaken. Well, Peru could have done with a little less of the excitement. The second group in November were allegedly assaulted and robbed at gunpoint, and you know what was the first thought that came into my mind. It was , 'Wow', how exciting!.
Well, gotta go now, and I hope I will have some fun news for you'll next week.
So, whatever you are doing, my friends, do it nice. Remember, you can never be true to everyone in this world. If you are true to yourself, and you know that what you have done, and are doing is great, then you do not need to do anything differently. Take care for now.





18th November, 2005

Hiya folks,

It's nice to be back again. That shows I'm still alive and kicking. That's what life is all about. When you are a child, you look forward to getting into double figures. You are not happy. You have heard of the good 'ol teens. You can't wait to get there. Years pass, and you are still not satisfied. You want the magic 'teen' out of your life forever. You have heard of good things happening when you make it to twenty and beyond. You get married, and have kids. Things don't stop there. You wait for the summer to arrive, and the most coveted 'summer holidays' to go off on vacation. Children grow up, and you get older. You look forward to 'pension' and your day at Golf and the Beach. Before you reach this final stage in your life, you look forward to the 'weekends', and you are so surprised that weekdays move so slowly, and weekends just breeze past. Are you all getting my point?
When you are younger, you measure your time in number of years. However, as you grow older, you begin measuring it in months, then in weeks and weekends. I have not reached the final stage yet, and when I do, I am certain people will be looking forward to the next day, and then finally, hoping to at least make it to the evening and catch some soccer on the tele. Si, senor'.
I was meaning to mention in my last blog, that the hits on my page was nearing the 10,000 mark. I have absolutely no idea who is visiting, and what the hell they are doing here, and getting pleasure out of browsing my pages, for no one (except a few) have actually written to me. So, I was hoping, the 10,000th visitor would write to me, and I would be happy to mail him/her(hopefully) a copy of my book. Yes, a signed copy, from you know who! So, even if you have not been the 10,000th visitor, then never mind, just lie about it, and I will be most happy to send you a copy of my book, anyways. Hopefully, some poor soul out there will get a chance to read my book free in addition to the 1 million I have purported to have sold already. (just kidding!)
Talking about my story, last week I casually mentioned to my friend Sal, that he was actually the Sal in my book. I had on purpose not given him the book to read, for I feared the casual, gay character might have him offended. But, you know what a couple of glasses of 'chardonnay' does to one's spirit and soul? Well, at the very least, it gets you talking, and talking was all that I did last week after I had downed a couple of glasses. He has insisted that I give him a copy of the book to read, but I have mentioned that the book is definitely out of stock and no signs of a second edition. I have it in mind, to write to Amazon and/or Barnes and Noble, to blacklist him from buying my book. It is too early in the day for me to be sued. I should make some money to be able to grant some of it back to him. Comprendo!
I promised to go out cycling this morning (being Friday and a lovely cool breeze blowing out there), however, I decided a glass of 'shiraz merlot cabernet' and the soft magic of "Aida' was more important, as I figured, my soul needed more relaxing after a frustrating and exhausting week, and I would find time to pressure my weary limbs and sagging muscles some other time. In other words, I am just too goddamn LAZY.
Well, got to go now, and write to me if you have any funny story or poem that you would like to share with the hundreds of visitors (live in hope and die in despair) that are seemingly frequenting my ever-so- famous website.
Buenos Noches my friends.


10th November, 2005

Hiya there folks. It's me once again.
If there was a way to abolish jetlag, then I would definitely be a firm advocate. Traveling between time zones not only disrupt ones way of life but also breaks a person down emotionally. Specially if you travel in a time zone of over 3-4 hours. After returning from the magical kingdom where the weather always has a say over everything that you do, and the rest of the time people are chatting about the underground bombing, racial hatred, etc, I found that my emotional status was at its lowest and where words used to flow like the tides in the ocean, now seemed a quagmire of quicksand. I hope it gets better soon, otherwise I will have to give up my writing, including writing my blog.
Need to get back fit also. Start tennis, cycling and jogging. If you do not do it like a pro, then you are like me. Doing it just to pass my time. I heard that Mongolia is full of undulations, and I better get fit from now if I am to undertake the trip next September.
So, what else to write.
I think I need something exciting, something enterprising, something to jolt me out of this quandary. I assume it has all got to do with boredom, loneliness and OLD AGE. Well, if that is the case, then I can proudly confirm my status along with the 80% of the population in this world.
Yes, I know what. I need to fall in love. No, not with myself. I hate it when I look at myself in the mirror every morning while I am shaving. Thank heavens I am not a throat slicer, for I have been tempted many times to discern how it would feel. I mean, slashing one's throat.
I have decided my book, A Magical Moment is a bore. So, I think I am going to start re-writing it. But, only maniana. And Maniana is soon enough for me. Well, I hope by next week I will have more cheerful news, and in that way, I will not dispel you from visiting my site and my blog in the future.
Till then take care.



26th October, 2005

Hola Amigos.
A very warm welcome to you all. I know I have been quite inconsistent in submitting my weekly blog, and although I had promised otherwise, it has all got to do with old age catching up on me. Remember, all of you down there, I mean in age and vitality, do as many things that you can while you can, and do not keep it until the morrow, for, guess what, tomorrow never comes! Right!

I think I have contracted the dreaded lethal strain of 'avian flu'. How did I arrive at this?
Well, a couple of days back, I had KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken for some of the dumbos ((including me)) out there), and in the evening I ended up with sore throat, runny nose and a groggy head that reminded me of the time I nearly drowned in the Arabian Sea. So, considering the timing of his highness the 'flu' in my system just after I consumed the greasy, toxic dose of chicken wings, I concluded it had to be nothing other than the 'bird flu' everyone is talking about. Well, I have some news for you, it ain't that bad.

Last week was a desperate attempt in putting together the third in the series of PAL programs we have set up for our bank, and I have pretty bad news for the new joiners. PAL 3 will be the toughest of them all, and I shall not invite them to read my blog. This is only reserved for PAL 1 who keep on reminding me that they make up for the majority of the readers who frequent my site. Well, I have news for them. I finally managed to get a copy of 'Twelve Angry Men', and after I have circulated the movie amongst them, I am most certain to set up many tough questions related to the movie. I know what they will say, 'we are ready for it'. But, they are yet to see my nasty, funny side. Just kidding. I have only the nasty side. Who ever thought I could be funny as well? Jeepers!

Mahler's symphony number two was very relaxing, but I have previewed better classical music programs, and it only got a 2 rating in some of the newspapers. The musical' Chicago', however, was breathtaking, and they had the lady ( I forgot her name) from Wonder Woman (didn't see that one yet) playing the role of Mama Morton.

I have been off tennis for some time. Actually, my fellow players reckon my tennis has been 'off' for quite some time for I have been avoiding my group and opting to play Paul instead. And, now that Paul has eventually figured out my game (that is to make me run and lose all my steam) I have decided to return to my previous group where, once in a while, I could still manage to steal a win or two.

Brian's group is leaving for Peru Inca Trail for the next 'Gulf for Good' challenge stint. I wish I was going as well, but then, the thought of joining them for a trip to 'Mongolia' next September, seems ever so inviting. It will have horse riding, biking and trekking all in the same venture. So, this sounds good to me. If anyone is interested, then check out www.gulf4good.org.

Well, if you, dear reader, have anything interesting to impart, then I will be most happy to post them for you.

Until next time, hasta maniana and buenos dias.



14th October, 2005

Hiya there.
And you all thought this was over, yeah?
Well, I 'm back again, and this time with a vengeance. Just kidding.
Had a problem with the hosting of the server. Hopefully it is a thing of the past, and if not, well get ready for many more interruptions. Hopefully none.
So, where do I begin? It seems that once the flow has been shattered, then it is very difficult to pick up the pieces once again. This is life, I guess.
That means I must do something different.
I am taking time off and proceeding to the land of 'opera's, theatre's and musicals'. Booked myself Mahler's Symphony No. 2, 'Resurrection' at the Royal Albert Hall on Tuesday vide the Internet. It could be a toss up between 'Chicago' or any other new musical currently running. Will let you in on it after my return. It has been a tough month and getting it back together demanded I take this 'very' special break. Which is exactly what I am doing. When I return in the last week of October, I hope that I shall be a rejuvenated man.
What am I ranting and raving about?
Just trying to act cool. An old and decrepit person as I, it will take more than a ten day lay-off and plenty of wine, women and song to get me 'up and running'.
I think I will take an early break with my blog this week, and promise I shall write more next week.
Till then take care, and Buenos Noches to all of you.



23rd September, 2005

Hola Amigos. Buenos dias.
A very good morning to you all.
Friday has blessed us with its presence once again. I thought that being close to end of September, the weather would be somewhat inviting to cycle at 10 am. I was wrong!
People call me stubborn. If they were to call me a 'bobo' or 'idiota' then perhaps it would make so much more sense. I was cursing on my way back at the heat and the humidity, when guess what, a group of people passed me by. Yes, three Englishmen, and what puzzled and despaired me was that they were smiling and enjoying as the hot sun beat upon them. Where do they get this zest and zeal? Okay, I guess they were Englishmen. How, you may ask? Well, I don't know for sure. One thing, they were white and the second they were enjoying the torrid weather. Make sense. Remember our saying in Dubai, Only Idiots (that's me) and Englishmen will venture into the hot midday Arabian Sun. (by the way, this phrase was discovered and made famous by fellow Englishmen residing in Dubai). Did you know that Englishmen have a morbid sense of humor? So, does that make me one also?

Last week I stumbled across a phrase, which impressed and motivated me a lot. I would like to share it with you.

A Winner is not one who never fails, but one who never quits

And I have such an example of a person who did just that. If you have the time, then visit this web page
http://www.aganarya.com/s/Superacion.WMV

Believe me, there will be a lot that you will gain by it.

My PAL students are very apprehensive whenever I direct them to such a site or tell them to look something up. They know this will only point them towards the 'horrible' assignments that their life has now become a part of. However, this is one page or a small video (definitely not travieoso) that will show determination, grit and positive attitude in the face of odds that one cannot envisage.

Our week ended with a nice but 'gut burning' lunch at Ashiana at the Sheraton Hotel. We had the pleasure of the company of PAL1 students and I was lucky enough to be lodged between the pretty Salwa and Naythar or Nadya (one of the twins, I don't remember which one, they are both pretty so it is fine, anyway), and the elegant Noora, the two Mariams, Firdaus and Ismail (mochas gracias for signing my guestbook).

On my tennis front, I was leading 5-4 and serving for the match, when, I guess Paul took another dose of viagara and came back from behind to torture me to a 7-5 defeat. I think I will put up a sign on the gate leading to the tennis court, that viagara is definitely bad for tennis. I am not sure that this will stop him from taking it just to beat me in tennis, but it could perhaps make life a lot more onerous for him.

An internet friend has a novel way of beginning a day feeling happy. His method is as follows
How to start your day with a positive outlook.
1. Open a New file in your PC
2. Name it 'Boss'
3. Send it to the recycle Bin
4. Empty the 'recycle bin'
5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete 'Boss' permanently?
6. Answer calmly, "Yes!" and hold the mouse button firmly.
7. Repeat this every morning

Well, I guess I might as well repeat my Buenos nochas to you all and hope that you will find time next week to read my blog. Whatever you are doing now, do it so that it adds value to your life, and I guess you will learn that, in life, this is all what matters anyway.



16th September, 2005

Hola Amigos,
It's blog time once again.
This week has been a weird one. On Tuesday, my computer crashed. When I took it to the 'computer doctor' the wiz had the nerve and audacity to tell me that the reason was because my pc was deluged with 'viruses', and he did not just stop at that, but winked at me and said, "Man, you sure have been traveiso (naughty)." Me, travieso? No way! Honest to goodness!
Okay, I might have browsed 'Easynews.com', but cross my heart, I was only interested in learning more about nature, and natural forms and shapes. And then, I had AOL Privacy wall (a firewall) supporting my PC and McAfee live. So, how in hell did all those dirty viruses get in and downloaded the naughty pictures, sure beats me? He told me that if I were to accept giving him copies of those, er, nasty ones, then I was in for a discount of 20%. In these days of high costs and inflation, a discount of 10% is also very forthcoming.
I wrote last time that only mad dogs and Englishmen dare venture into the hot afternoon sun. And, I agreed that I could only be the 'mad dog' as I was no Englishman. Well, September is renowned more for its humidity and less for heat, and last weeks tennis I sure wished I was in the comfort of my apartment sipping on, well whatever, and listening to Mozart, then trying to throw balls in the air, and stopping midway through a serve, for the reason that precipitation was oozing out of the ball into my face. You could actually squeeze water off the ball.
Perhaps, it was not so bad, for I reckon Paul was having a harder time than me, and I sure got over the jinx, and thrashed him 6-4. Our match continues, and so does my story, the life of a 'one more wannabee'.
We were discussing 'choices' in my PAL program at the bank. It is quite important to understand that we are the owner of any 'choice' that we make, however, what we don't own are the 'consequences'. Good or Bad, it shall be what we are eventually gonna reap, whenever we make our choices. A good example is that of our Late 'Father of Dubai' Sheikh Rashid the father of our current ruler, Sheikh Maktoum. In the early sixties, while browsing through 'Newsweek', he asked his advisor how much would it cost to put a one page Ad on Dubai? His advisor said, "Your highness, such an advertisement can cost us US 10,000/". A very huge amount considering it was 45 years ago. But His Highness shook his head and said, "The whole world knows America, I just want a few people who will read this Advert, know that there is another place in this world called Dubai. That, we also exist."
That was his vision, and today we need not talk of how Dubai has taken off.
Another way to look at 'choices' would be, as my boss would reiterate to the students everyday. He would say, "If any of you feel that tomorrow you are tired and would like to take the day off, then it is fine with me. However, the consequence would be, had I to give you all a test, then those absent would be marked zero."
So, the point of all this is, that in life, we get to, many crossroads where we have to ultimately make a choice. The choice is in our hands, however, the consequences are something that we cannot control.
More next time,
Buenos nochas.




9th September, 2005

Hola folks,

When I wrote last week that I had the desperate and hopeful inclination that winter had finally arrived, I thought I'd explain this in finer details. In Dubai, we not only judge the weather through the heat or coolness of the day, but rather how we feel during the different periods of time.
While summer is too hot and humid, and winter is snugly cozy and fine, summer too has some fine distinct points. I am going to relate a few.
n summer, you do not need to book restaurants (That is sort of not so true anymore), tennis courts or cinema tickets. There is less traffic on the roads and all the lunatics ( or perhaps, most of them) are on vacation, so we more sober drivers can actually enjoy driving. The workload is less, so you get jobs done quicker, especially in Government departments. Appointments are easier and quicker, and swimming pools are relatively empty. (I did say relatively).

One of my PAL students asked me, what I considered the true meaning of "Values".
While I could have quickly made a desperate dive to a dictionary, unearthed the meaning and happily conveyed (Visual Thesaurus says Values are beliefs of a person or social group in which they have an emotional investment (either for or against something), also any cognitive content held as true. The Oxford Dictionary mentions Values as the moral principles and beliefs or accepted standards of a person or social group) to my student, I thought about it.
Actually Values are something that are one's beliefs and integrity. (That's what I feel, and all of you out there who are reading this may feel free to correct me) I see it as how one feels about him or herself. As Richard Bach put it in one of his tales, "Your only obligation in any life time is to be true to yourself. Being true to anyone else is not only impossible but a mark of a fake person."
So long as you are true and honest to yourself in what you are doing, then you will always add value to your action. In time, this will become part of your beliefs and emotions and control your attitude and behaviors. Whew. I am learning to be a professor. Do you all think it is time that you all addressed me as 'the nutty professor'?
This reminds me of the fact that I have just figured out that I must truly be mentally sick. (My friend Sam thinks I am really getting decrepit, if it is now only that I have realized this.)
I play tennis early in the morning. I spend 70% of my time on the Internet. It is not enough that most of my working day, including my lectures are using a computer of some sort, and then when I am back home, I spend most of my leisure time . . . you guessed it, on the internet. Then, whenever I can create time, I am actually cycling in this scorching and sordid weather. There is a very famous old 'saying' in Dubai, that, Only Mad Dogs and Englishmen take a walk in the afternoon sun in Dubai. Since, I am not an Englishman, then I must surely be a mad dog.

Hey, I must tell you of another fun thing that happened the other day (now, you can see how low my values are depreciating daily with the advent of time)
A girl walked in for a job, I think she was either Lebanese or Syrian. And, she was tall and masculine. She made me go 'down' memory lane when I was studying and working in New York. My friend had a video cum photo lab, and we used to work there in our spare time, which was usually always. And whenever, a pretty girl would walk in, the three of us would make a dash to the counters to serve her. This time this tall handsome young woman approached us, and I was surprised that none of my friends wanted to have a 'go' at her. I took that as my perfect chance, and soon we were chatting, and oblivious of the world around us, sort of, love at first sight. After she left, I turned to my friends, beaming, and displaying thumbs up sign. "I got her," I told them, pleased with myself, "and she has invited me to her place later on tonite," I was surprised when they both laughed at me, and Kenny said, and his words shocked me, "Don't tell me, you didn't know that she was a transvestite."
The way they were smiling, I was not so sure whether they were just being 'sore losers', but I was certainly not going to her apartment to find out the truth.

My friend in London asked me to refer a nice book for her to read. I suggested, 'Thinner' by Richard Bachman (alias Stephen King). And she said, great, I need a book like that to read; I could use it, as I am putting on some weight. I told her that this was no diet book, but if she would read it at bedtime, then it would definitely scare the fat out of her body. I don't think she is going to buy the book after all.

A little word on my tennis. I have been losing for the past two weeks, and Paul makes no effort to hide his pleasure. Last week I was romping ahead at four nil, but I am not certain if he took Viagara during the break, because he returned with such a vengeance to beat me 6-4.

Well, that is all for now, goodbye, ma'asalaamah, adieu, sayonara or whatever. And, see you all next time. If you have anything funny to share, or some nice quotes, then please feel free to email me.




2nd September, 2005

Hey all of you, it is September once again, and blue skies, deep blue seas and the chirping of insects, the humming of bees and the cool misty feeling in the air is all beckoning us to welcome Autumn in Dubai.

Well, those of you living in Dubai, must feel that either I have had a terrible nightmare and have awakened with a bang, or it is the previous nights hangover.

I think it is a mix of both. While waiting to go online to chat with my special friend in London, I put my head down to cool off for a moment and realized very soon it was 4.30 in the morning. I could have been dead and long gone, had it not been the nightmare of imagining a tiger sharing my apartment with me. Reminded me of the 'tiger' in my first book. So, tried as I maight, sleep just eluded me. So, at 5.30 I decided this was a good time to return to cycling.
Got my bike out, and to my horror I noticed I had a flat tire (or a fully deflated one).

Bingo! That's when I put my plan 'B' into motion. I had had contemplation of this very disastrous day, and had the intelligence to purchase this air pump from Geant for AED 29.50. Cheapo, yes sort of, and "Pound foolish, Penny Wise', well that's me. It took me twenty minutes to figure this equipment out, and when I did, I discovered it inflated each and every thing else in the world that needed inflating, except my damn rear bicycle tire.

Yes, (very funny if you guys are all laughing) I should have picked up the GBP 20/- bicycle tire inflator from Selfridges when I was in London.
But hey, I just decided I wasn't going to begin the week on such a catastrophic mode.
I am, at times very stubborn, actually most of the times at wrong moments.
So, I packed the bicycle once again, drove to the nearest gas station and was back in no time.

This was perhaps a good move, for , believe me, it was very pleasant cycling to the Meadows and then the lakes surrounding the Springs. It's autumn perhaps, that early in the morning in September.
On my return I contemplated whether it would be wise to cycle hands free which was what I had figured out the last time I took to the bike, and yes, at first it was conscious competence which finally gave way to unconscious competence. But, do not believe your friends when they say it is as easy cycling uphill hands free, unless they are hopeful in trying to photograph you lying in a heap for their next photography competition.

Isn't it funny that in our daily lives we go through a whole range of emotions and show them in many ways, some obvious and some restrained, yet when we wish to identify true emotions we have so much trouble.

In this week's Management Development Program at the bank, we were trying to identify which one of us was a 'front and center' person, who was a "in the wings' person and who was a 'behind the scene' person. The identical twins turned out to be just the opposite of each other when we agreed that one was a 'front and center' person' and the other 'in the wings'.

Desperation is the mother of invention, and if you think you have a future as a writer, you're nothing if not desperate. Such is the advice from Fondling Your Muse by John Warner, and I shall end on this positive ( er. .. slightly negative) mode, and hope to chat with you'll next week. Till then, take care!




August 26th, 2005

I'm back again.
Hola Amigos (just to show you guys out there, I am learning Spanish and someone nice and pretty is teaching me).

It has been such a tiring week for me, you know when you have so many things to do, but you find you cannot get anything done. You decide every morning that when you return from work you are going to tie yourself to your chair and begin churning out all those inspiring thoughts on your computer, but then, NOTHING strikes and 'nothing, eventually gets done.

This morning I got up with a bad headache. I don't know how and from where this 'cliché' has cropped up, like a 'bad headache' or a 'depressing and debilitating bout of flu'. Has any one ever mentioned a 'good headache' or a 'nice and pleasantly welcoming moment of influenza'?

Right! That's what I mean. It has been a week where digressing from the truth or leaning away from things needed to get done has been very paramount.

So, going back to the headache, or perhaps the after effect of an heavy indulgence to absorbing umpteen glasses of fermented white grape juice the night before, or the influenza germs enjoying a quick re-return this month to agonize my already incapacitated immune system, I decided I needed to get my BLOG done, or whatever?


It was then I noticed this little cockroach (my first in fifteen months when I shifted from my cockroach contaminated- prostitute infested studio block in Deira) dilly dallying and enjoying a moment of leisure next to my computer screen, and here I was, the master of the house, face wrinkled in agony, head all puffed up, and hating the very word 'existence'.

I normally hate taking life, but bad headache or not, hangover or not, went after the poor, little ba---rd and made certain I pif paffed it to such an extent that I ensured there was one being in this world hating life more than me.

An update on last weeks 'tennis news'. Paul changed his racket, his tennis shoes, got new tennis attire, and thrashed the life out of my tennis. I lost 6-1, and it ended so quickly, that I hardly had any time to reflect upon my excuses, like tennis elbow, bad back, etc.

At my work place, my old PAL students returned to be with us for a couple of days. It was fun welcoming all those smiling little beings, and the girls all excited and chattering away.

The new PAL program has begun, and surprising enough, we have nine males and three females this time. Do you think that Dubai Lads have now at last become serious once again, of probably, their Dad's have stopped funding their Ferrari's and Mazarati's?

A 'Lateral Thinking' question for you all:
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what
criteria that defines a patient to be institutionalized. Well, said the
Director, we fill up a bathtub, we offer a teaspoon, teacup, and a bucket
to the patient and ask the patient to empty the bathtub.

Okay, here's your test:

1. Would you use the spoon?
2. Would you use the teacup?
3. Would you use the bucket?

Well, the answer:

"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the
bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the cup."

"Noooooo.." answered the Director. "A normal person would pull the plug."


So, I would like to close this days blog with a thought of my own.

It is not that if you want to accomplish something you must do definite things, but rather if you want to make it, certain things will give you a better opportunity.
So, Life is like a lottery. To win you need to be a part of something. If you hope and wish that luck and destiny would somehow appear from nowhere and deposit itself into your lap, then think again, man, think ' a lot' again! As Einstein once said, "You are crazy when you continue to do what you have always done and expect things to change."
If the odds of getting hit by the lightning are a 1000 to 1 when standing near a tree and 900 to 1 when standing near a utility pole, what difference does it make where you stand between the two.
Well then, the only way to PREDICT the future is to CREATE the future.

So, a sip of 'Pinot Grigio' and Verdi's La Traviata, it is 'Hasta La Proxima Semana' to all you out there.




August 19th, 2005

Hi there once again
The week appears to fly.

My State of being depressed is taking up new shapes and figures, however, because of the busy schedule, I have not been able to worry so much. Anyway, my boss thinks that I worry too much.

Dubai TV did a fair coverage of our 'Al Misha'al' program at the bank. So, I can now officially mention that 'I am NEARLY famous now'.

My tennis with Paul is continuing with the same excitement and furor where we left off three weeks back. Until the time I was leading 5-2, I did not mention anything about my tennis elbow. However, things changed when he inched up to 5-4, then I started clutching my elbow and (sort of) began grimacing in pain. However, my win at 6-4 needed that I desist bringing up the topic of my tennis elbow. The competition continues (a best of 5) and trusting me, I will keep this excuse for some more opportune moment.

I have thought of writing my next book.
Whenever Stephen King thought of writing a new book ( read my emphasis on 'thought') there was an immediate pre-sale of about a million copies.
So, I wondered if there would be any takers, since I am also contemplating on writing again.
Good NEWS! My Mom was very happy that I was getting back into my groove, and asked me to reserve a signed copy for her. I asked her, 'would you be happy to purchase a copy'. She replied, 'Naw, I rather I receive it as a gift from you."
Well, beggars can't be choosers.

This week, I am posting John Keats 'An Ode to a Nightingale'. This takes me back down memory lane, and also those of you who have read my 'A Magical Moment' will understand where I got my idea of the ailing 'Jawhera'.

Well, all of you OUT THERE, if you have any interesting piece of literature, or poem or joke (be it yours or copied from Wordsworth), I'd be most happy to share it with the million visitors (only 80-90 daily) who frequent my page every month.

Till next week, and whatever you are doing right now, just make sure it ADDS value to your integrity and self.




August 12th, 2005

Started this week on a positive note but ended in a somewhat negative mode.

My tennis elbow has healed 80% and was given the go ahead to meet Paul in Saturday early morning tennis. Not such good news considering that I have been laid low due to laziness, more laziness, the lack of will and the excuse of 'tennis elbow' to refrain from any exercise, while Paul's been at a health farm in UK plus undergoing rigorous training. Before he left, I was able to overcome him 6-3, and then 7-5 in tie break (it was too hot to complete the second set, not that it is any cooler now), and he is desperate to dispatch me to all the corners of the tennis court. If I lose, my trump card will be my tennis elbow. Tee hee.

I did mention earlier that I have a new designation. I was mighty proud to flaunt it for the first two days, then now, the feeling of elation just managed to disappear into tons of waste that keeps on accumulating on my desk.

On Wednesday, my friends daughter was refused a job at the bank for reasons that I cannot cite, but that depressed me a lot. Then, a couple of friends returned my new book, saying that my previous one was much better. I thought the first one was not so good, then I let you to judge, what is the actual cause of my mental agony.

Drowning my sorrows in consuming a whole bottle of Chardonnay and then lullaby-ing myself to sleep on the entire unabridged version of Aida could be a likely option, or simply taking my bike and speeding across Sheikh Zayed in the heat of our summer's day could be the other pathetic alternative.

My special friend has chubby cheeks and a smile that extends to her ears, and this prompted me to write this poem

HER SMILE

Whenever I look at her, she smiles
Her eyes glow, then my heart, it flutters.
I want to tell her, please don't,
your smile is strong like a snakes venom,
if it touches me, then I shall die.

Her Smile! As if life itself,
But too strong for me to sustain,
Yet, I want to reach out to her,
To be a part of her universe,
Then surely, I realize the outcome.

I wish that she shows some affection,
Not to take advantage of her powers,
To release me from this trance.
But, is this my true desire?
For, if she ever stops smiling,
Then anyway, I shall die!

Well, I shall leave you all on this positive note, with one wish, that whatever you are doing right now, enjoy the moment.




August 5th, 2005

Hey you out there. Ready for another round of web logging.
Let me start with a nice joke I heard:

There are two yobs, now corrected and over fifty, and they decide to complete their education. One goes to the registrar who advises him that at the evening school he could take up English, Math's, Science and Logic.
The old guy thinks for a while then says, "I know English, Science and Math's, but what is this Logic?"
The registrar says, "Okay, let me explain to you the concept of Logic. Do you have a lawn mover at home?"
The Yob replies, "yes, I do."
"Well. Logic tells me, that if you have a lawn mover at home, then you must have a Lawn, right?"
"Yes, that is true,"
"Then," the registrar continues, "If you have a lawn then you must have grass. And with a lawn and grass, logic tells me, that you must live in a house,"
"Wow!"
"And, if you live in a house, you must have a wife and kids,"
"Yes, that's true. How did you know? I have a wife and kids!" he exclaims,
"So logic now insinuates," the registrar concludes, 'that you are a heterosexual,"
The old guy cannot believe his eyes, "This Logic is fantastic. I will definitely take Logic."
So, he returns home and explains to his friend that they are offering four courses and one of them is logic.
The friend is also confused.
He says, "I know English, Math's and Science, but what is this, Logic?"
"Let me explain logic to you, "The first friend says with a bemused look on his face, "Let's say, do you have a Lawn Mower at home?"
The other friend shakes his head, "No, I don't,"
The first friends face falls, "Oh. . ."
He quickly recovers and utters with a smile, "You see, then logic says that YOU ARE A POOF!"

Doc Mccurdy sent me this erotic poem, so for those of you who may find it a bit steamy and offended, then please skip the next few lines:
A mark of my Sobriety (erotic) by Doc Mccurdy

We cuddled together as one,
in an unusual circumstance, in the weirdest of position
drawing in energy,
both, intimately and ethereally,
from each other.
To sustain purity,
and give life to soul

We tried heartily.
Orally. Imperious and dominant,
locked deep in competition,
to please, yet to receive,
the spiritual gift.

My energy now draining,
contemplating to let go,
the desire overcoming me,
to release, not take in
Succumb to the pleasures,
of the physical,
and deprive the soul.
I tried to struggle hard
Consolidating.
Putting on pressure.
Yet, her dampness,
and her endeavor
overcoming me.
Come the release,
and she savored her lips,
A thin wry smile.
Nonchalant and calm.
Once again,I had settled
A worldly compromise.
The pleasure;
mine to consume,
The gain; hers to keep.

Okay, back to the weeks happenings.
At work, our titles have been changed; for the better, I assume. I am no longer Management Trainer (seemed more like Circus trainer to people in the past) my new title is Manager UAE National Development. All's well, except that the last two lines suggested 'Your role level and job grade remains unchanged. Looking forward to higher levels of excellence'.So, when we enquired that with this new title, are we supposed to perform better, or were we okay with the same level of performance.My boss accepted for once (first time in his life) that he had 'goofed'. And, my colleague and I made the best of the 'little' fun we had at our boss's expense. Believe me, such fun times are few and in-between. Whatever!

Our ILSD forum is coming on quite nicely. The short story competition is flying, and tomorrow we are having a workshop where we are anticipating at least a hundred members. Will write all about it in next weeks blog.

Will end today under the hypnotic spell of Verdi's AIDA and a whiff of Jacob Creek's Chardonay. Until next week, do take care, all of you, out there.




29th July, 2005

Another week comes to an end, and the next pops up to take its place. Such is life as it breezes by us. I wonder every time that is it just my imagination, or life is actually moving in the fast lane, these days.
This week was notable for three major (or minor, depending on how you perceive it) events, one we had a new batch of students, then I ended up with 'flu' (desperate moments) and finally got a scorching report from a critique on my new book.
So, first come first.
I am halfway through Anthony De Mello's Awareness (this guy although deceased) has truly captivated my interests and I thought it would be a great idea to pass some of his 'way of thinking' to the new batch of students who returned to our development Center after three weeks of intense coaching elsewhere. I related the following story (from his book) to them during my first class:
" A man found an eagle's egg and put it in a nest of a barnyard hen. The eaglet hatched with the brood of chicks and grew up with them.
All his life the eagle did what the barnyard chicks did, thinking he was a barnyard chicken. He scratched the earth for worms and insects. He clucked and cackled. And he would thrash his wings and fly a few feet in the air.
Years passed and the eagle grew old. One day he saw a magnificent bird above him in a cloudless sky. It glided in graceful majesty among the powerful wind currents, with scarcely a beat of its strong golden wings.
The old eagle looked up in awe. 'Who's that ?' he asked.
'That's the eagle, the king of the birds,' said his neighbor. 'He belongs to the sky. We belong to the earth—we're chickens.' So, the eagle lived and died a chicken, for that's what he thought he was."
So, it has now become a classy phrase, Do you want to be an Eagle or live like a chicken?
A critique of my book left me very depressed when she took apart my new book. Some of (perhaps most of) what she said made sense, but, what could I do differently? This is the best that I have got. Poor me.
So, I am sitting alone this Friday, sneezing and sniffing away, and even Verdi's Aida is not adding any solace to my depressed self.
But, what the hell! This is life I guess, and until next week, I hope I will have recovered some of my old glory and wit and humor.





July 22nd, 2005

Hi, it's blog time once gain.
A famous guy once said that if the probable is improbable, then impossible is the only answer.
Do you know who it was?
Elementary, my dear Watson.
Yes, it was Sherlock Holmes.
In my training, I have a new group of High School Students who have just graduated and joined the bank, and sad to say, their level of English is poor to poorer (no, not dumb to dumber, for they are very, very bright. Well, most of them anyway, sort of ...)
I decided that if they neeeded to learn swimming, then what better than pushing them straight into the deep end and explaining that to stay afloat (and of course ALIVE) they need to kick their legs and move their arms frantically.
So, I gave them assignments, such as 'To Be or not to Be', the Bermuda triangle and The concept of DNA. I figured that if the probability of them learning English in a few days and mastering the language was mighty improbable, then I should try out the IMPOSSIBLE. I hope they will prove me correct. well, next week we will find out!
It is Friday morning here, and I am slowly swaying to 1812 (by the way I got quite a few bargains at HMV in London. (could be they were laughing all the way as i made to the counter).
This week my dear friend from Ecuador, Marisol, has contributed to The 'Poem' of the week.
If you wish to contribute, either to The Poem of the Week, or The Humor of the Famous, and/or anything else, then please do drop me a line at infor@ayadhfarooq.com.
Until next week, ciao



Friday 15th July

Okay! It is Friday once again, and life couldn't be hotter in Dubai. And returning from the cold, overcast and nippy evenings in London to this hot, blistery and humid condition in Dubai. . . . oh well! However, the nostalgic feeling I got when I stepped down outside the plane informed me that I am home, and home is…where your heart is.
So, then how was London. Well, a lot of wining and dining, a couple of fantastic plays, a drink at the pub watching cricket, browsing through a humongous collection of books at Foyles, then a meal somewhere close to London bridge with Chloe (as featured in my story, A Magical Moment) and her friends, then an evenings walk all the way to the Waterloo station across the scenic Thames and so on and on …
Yeah, right! I wouldn't mind getting back on the plane for another fortnight or two in London. Specially since I have made this amazing acquaintance with a special friend from Ecuador, and from whom I now understand, is so replete of fun loving and affectionate people.
My friend Christina (my screenplay tutor) is trying to convince me that next time I visit the UK, I should go all the way to Scotland to a little town called Stirling. So, perhaps, I may just do that next time.
Some of you asked me to note down my preferences in classical music. I am actually very despotic when it comes to choice. My favorites are the big names, such as Tchaikovsky, Mozart, Strauss, and the likes. However, my top five musical pieces would be 1) Johann Strauss II – Emperor Waltz 2) Tchaikovsky –Marche Slave (1812 Overture) 3) Bizet – 'Quannd je vous aimerai? Habanera: L'amour est un oiseau rebelle' (Carmen) 4) Mozart – Symphony No. 40 and 5) Beethoven – Fur Elize
Well, more next week.




Friday 8th July, 2005

It's another week already, and what a week!
The euphoria of winning the Olympic bid followed by the 'underground services' bombing was all what I needed to see during this trip to London. Mind you, I was destined for the 10am 'Piccadilly Line' to a high profile meeting which has now been postponed indefinitely, and that's quite a shame. However, if the bombing had been an hour later, instead of 9 am, then . . . who knows?
Went to see 'The Phantom of the Opera' on Wednesday, and had special invitation to the 'Brain of Britain' recordings on BBC1.So, if you tune in to the channel on, I think in October, on 21st and 28th, then I am one of the guys clapping in the audience. Big Deal (ha ha), but it i was still worth it. It confirmed one thing though, yes, and that is I am a 'dumbo', and I was happy that I was not one of those answering questions. I got two questions correct which nearly matched the guy who came in last.
London weather is dismal; very cloudy and raining, but I am still managing to enjoy my walks. Will be going to the Tate Gallery on Saturday with a Dubai colleague who is in London on a sabbatical, and then probably to 'Chicago' the musical on Sunday, that is hoping if I can get the tickets. That should wrap up the weeks happenings. Nothing great on my book, however.
So, until next week. Take care




Friday 1st, July

Can you believe it? It's July already. This was one of the more hectic weeks for sometime. Tried to get all pending work out of the way. I am all set to fly to London and meet Border Books. Keeping my fingers crossed. Perhaps, this will be my lucky trip.
Going to miss all my friends in Dubai, though. Specially the kids (well, the grown up kids) in my program at the bank. Promised them that I would mention each of them by name. Well, there is Hayat, her highness, Nora and the twins Nadya and Nayther, Salwa and Firdaus, the two Mariams, and last but not the least, the hulks Ismail and Masood.
Christina returned my Assignment three, and I am now certain I will never be a great 'screenplay' writer. The two page assignment got back with five pages of correction. She is great, and if anyone is interested in learning how to write a 'screenplay', then let me know and I will forward you her address.
Hey, did I mention I finally learnt to cycle hands free. Okay, all you guys out there, you did it when you were kids. So, no big deal. Yeah. Well, gotta say this, for one who in his first fifty years, never learned even how to sit on a bike, getting this far is one mean achievement. Don't agree with me if you do not want to , but the truth is, I am enjoying every minute of it. (fifty-one or not, whatever!)
Okay, will fill you all in about my London trip when I am back next week.
Chiou for now.




Friday 24th June, 2005

How time flies. Shut your eyes, and open it, and lo behold, it is Friday again. Well, it is music time once more. Deliberated between Bach and Carmen, Carmen won the day. I decided to opt for red wine instead. Beaujolais somehow tastes better when you are listening to Opera. Sort of?
I went cycling this morning, started at 5.45 and returned at 7.15. The poor laborers I passed on my way to and back, must have been pondering whether to call me a lucky sod or just one without a life. The latter is what my friends at the bank think about me when I tell them that I get up at 5 every morning, and do all the writing stuff.
Talking about writing, Christina ( my screenplay tutor) truly impressed me when she returned my assignment two. Talking about 'words of wisdom' she was able to open my eyes to the hundreds of flaws (in my 700 words document). My boss at the bank does the same with me. For some uncanny reason, he is always able to figure out all the shortcomings and errors I have seemingly overlooked in most of my projects.
My boss also has the opinion that if you have one enemy or even one person in your circle of concern, then you are a loser. So, I decided to make amends and approached one of my colleagues with whom I do not get along at all well. I tried to be extra nice to her, and guess what, she rebuffed me thinking I was making a pass at her??? Wonders can never cease!
Oh well, this is all for now. More next time




Friday 17th June, 2005

It has been a fun, but quite tiring week. On Saturday we had our ILSD's (International Literary Society of Dubai) first soiree. It was a fun affair, and we were around twenty or so participants (we were expecting 50 or so, but whatever?). We had nice chats, a couple of guys had their poems read aloud, and many photographs were taken, a couple of them, I am beginning to cherish.
I had a fun but embarrassing moment on Sunday. I am a trainer at a local bank, and my latest group of 12 newly joined aspiring and budding inductees(average age 22, and 80 percent girls, and by the way, I am 51 (old and decrepit) if you have not already guessed my age). Well, in an open forum, I let them decide on the topic. They chattered and giggled amongst themselves, and then came up with the topic, which was, 'Sir, have you ever been in love?' For the first time (well not the very first time) I was speechless.
I am on assignment two of my Screenplay Course. It is fun, but I am still not sure if I getting somewhere. (over there, where?) My first assignment came back with the
E-teacher quite confused. Well, I guess I got somewhere with her.
Had my glass of wine listening to 'Carmen' this Friday. Wine tastes better with Strauss, I must admit. Well, more next week.


Friday 10th June, 2005

Okay. So, everyone is doing it. I mean, amongst other things, writing a blog. So, why not, me? Therefore, I have decided. Right. This Friday (and every Friday) onwards I will write my own very blog. If I get time, then perhaps, I will go back, down memory lane. (And, oh yes, if any of you guys wish to write your own blog and have it posted on my web page, then just be my guest and I will be happy to share your blog with the rest of the world (150 people), who will chance upon my web site. So, here goes nothing:

The days just fly. Friday's and Saturday's are our weekend. So, we usually go back to work on a Sunday. This Saturday, our committee of wannabee writer's and poets met at the picturesque Dubai Creek and Golf club. Can you believe it, they are offering villas to let for AED 240,000/-- a year, that is roughly USD 65000/- Gotta think I will be very crazy if I aim to spend some time there as a tourist. Would rather stay at Burj Al Arab for AED 15000/- daily. At least that will come to something. Showing off, perhaps. Oh, there I go again. Well we met with some of the judges for our first short story competition in Dubai. It's really and truly catching up, this ILSD (International Literary Society of Dubai), I mean. We will be having our first soiree' or whatever, and we are expecting 50 members to show up.
I have begun my screenplay course online. I have just submitted assignment number one and hope that the e-teacher will not return it marking it as junk.
I got a call from someone. I am only going to mention this as ' a blast from the past'. No need to get into any more details.
Friday morning I listened to Strauss (two hours). Love 'The Emperor Wlatz'. Sounds even better if you are sipping Jacob's Creek 'Chardonnay'.